migraine.

I had a migraine last week. It came outta nowherI’e and totally knocked me down (literally and figuratively). I was just walking into the spin studio for class, a 45min caloric cardio ball buster. I could have walked about but honestly I just thought, "well I'm going to be in a world of hurt so why not burn some fat in the meantime." I'm not sure that was a good idea.

Of course, a migraine happens when Hubbs it out of town and my son has minimum day.

I didn't "take" the migraine like a champion. I had a total emotional meltdown to be honest. and poor Bravery had to watch 5 hours of movies while I laid in a dark room feeling sorry for myself. It's such a trigger. When someone's grieving, every day life just seems too much. I THRIVED in Auburn. I was relaxed, mindful, dare I say even, happy.  But that's because I didn't have to live in reality, really. Every day was about being, not doing.

At one point, I just smiled, thanked God for the pain, and said, "thank you for answering my prayers." You see, I had asked God many times to give me Amelie's pain. "Give it to me, God, for I can take it. Cease her suffering and I will give thanks." and He did.

She no longer feels pain. Her experience is not limited by the fragile, sensitive, nerve-wracked human body. Her soul has been freed. She exists now in a realm where light blinds out darkness, where love lives in astounding abundance.

I’ve been getting them more often, and it’s baffling. How many migraines did she have and could never speak of? It pains me to even ponder. But no matter, that is no longer.